Saturday, June 30, 2018

Random thoughts about the perception of Freedom

I think it's as much about what we perceive as it is the reality.   When I was a kid, my dad used to take me swimming. The family rule was, if you can't touch the bottom, you're too far out.  I followed that, knowing if I got in trouble, he couldn't swim out  to save me.  One day a bunch of kids came along, and we were horsing around, but then they got further out than I was "allowed' to go,  and that was the end of that.  My dad said, "why didn't you go with them?  You know how to swim..."  and I had to think that one over carefully.  What the rule REALLY was, but unstated,  "if there's no one else here...". 

That may very well obtain in everything.   Some rules/laws  are silly.  Some rules/laws  have unwritten unspoken codicils.  Some will save your life, some will kill you.

There was a flap recently about a woman who was pulled over on an interstate in the midwest for going too slow in the fast lane.  Her valid argument was, she was going the speed limit.  But she had a trail of 20 cars behind her.  They were following the other law, which was, you cannot pass on the right.  You can be too 'correct' to the detriment of everyone else.

If you think you are in a totalitarian state, and behave that way, then you are, no matter what the reality is.  Many early immigrants came here from truly dreadful places,  and they brought with them the idea that the world is a police state, and they were as terrified here as they were there.   Police were jailers, as far as they were concerned.

Most of us break little rules every day,  sometimes with a resounding crash.  Sometimes we don't even realize what we're doing until the process server shows up.  Or the building inspector. Sometimes we do,  and forge ahead anyway.   That's called flying under the radar.

I'm still fairly cautious about swimming out beyond my depth, well aware that no one will be paddling out to rescue me,  but I also know my own boundaries.  Most of the time.  😈

Tuesday, June 26, 2018



not a scrap left behind
no signatures,
no business ledgers,
no hard-to-decipher hieroglyphic handwriting
not even a social security card
or a birthday card

even all the addresses,
new and abandoned,
were hidden with a careful application
of black magic marker
across each one in the address book

All the negatives
most of the photos--
books, clothing that belonged
to someone else

she must have spent most of her days
in a haze of anger, confusion,
and caution,
wiping out any trace of anyone else
who ever lived—or died—
in that house,

until the only thing that remained
was one old woman
who lost even the memory of herself

Monday, June 25, 2018

Peter Dinklage

Fun to watch, and it makes you think.  =)

Friday, June 15, 2018

Charlie and his big adventure

Today is Charlie's annual show at the vet's.  They send out this really funny suggestion letter telling us we can 'train our cats" to enter a cat carrier on their own.  They never met Charlie, the claustrophobe.
He goes into hysterics at the sight of a carrier, refuses even to sit in cartons with more than four sides, and unlike every cat I've ever known, he gets no joy out of paper bag  boo or scaring the bejabbers out of passing cats by hiding in a box and leaping out at them.

Annnnd later.

Had his shots, the vet cooed all over him, and we came home.

Got back here about 11:00,  Charlie vaulted out of the car and stayed outside, out of range, until just a few minutes ago.  When I saw him in the yard,  he would open his mouth and close it (no sound, just his usual unspoken commentary) a few times, and then turn on his fluffy heels and leave to sulk under the porch.   My husband finally enticed him in but when he saw me (the cat, not the husband) he flattened his ears and left the room.
My husband, ever positive, said, "well, you're the one who took him..."

I've never seen a cat so unforgivingly pissed as this one.

Maybe by tomorrow.

shakes head.  walks away, muttering.

Thursday, June 14, 2018

Revenant T13


How does one explain
waking from a deep dreamless sleep
into moonlight with your heart pounding
your right wrist encircled
by  a hand you haven't felt in 50 years?

and  in the morning
you still feel his hand
on the small of your back

as you send  desperate messages  into the air
not even sure what they are beyond  the longing to connect
to touch  to recall
that keeps you rooted to the spot
waiting for the phone to ring

Monday, June 11, 2018

Squirrel Drama

The first I knew of it, I had a cat standing on top of his covered  catbed, staring out the window.  A squirrel was doing that  "angry chicken with a stuck egg" thing they do when they're mad.
I looked out the window too,  and realized I was eye to eye with a large grey squirrel, and my aren't they large when you are nose to nose with them and only a pane of glass between...

He had somehow been chased up the side of the house and come to ground on the second floor windows, unable to get back down--and the roof overhang made it impossible for him to escape that way.
Charlie, the other cat, was outside, peering up expectantly.  Aha, I thought,  guess who...

I went out, grabbed Charlie, and put him inside.  Tried to entice mr. squirrel down with a board that almost reached the front door lintel.  nope.  He was too high up to risk jumping and while he could charge across the clapboards horizontally he wouldn't risk the steady downward plunge.   Trust is not a given with squirrels, they hate everyone.  Like Markie.

Finally I took a heavy cotton sheet and draped it invitingly out the upstairs window, and left it at that.  The cats are by now galloping from window to window, shouting encouragement.  Probably along the lines of, "jump, you four footed rat, you, JUMP".

And sure enough, after about an hour we heard a scrabbly sound and then a hearty thump, and there was Mr. Squirrel, racing across the lawn to the nearest tree...whether he used the sheet as a faux rope, we shall never know.  I like to think he did.

Thursday, June 7, 2018

Vengeance is mine, saith the weather gods

Every year I have this little dance I do, about the storm sash/screen door sash and when should I put in the screen?  Seems like a simple question.

Every year if I guess wrong, two days later we are visited by the  mother of all snow storms, or a temperature dtop to below freezing, and I just know after all this time, there is no right time for switching from storm sash to screen.  The weather gods are waiting for this.

April was ungodly, May wasn't much better, so I held off.  Five days ago, on a lovely balmy June day I finally unsealed the back door and put in the screen insert on the entry door.  Nice. Warm wind wafting in,  birds shouting...overnight the temperature went from 75 to 40.  It started to rain, and the wind picked up.  I've had the kitchen stove going ever since.

Today was semi nice, we rounded up a cousin and went for a woods walk, waving hello and goodbye to about three million mosquitoes.  Damp but doable.   My husband keeps believing those god awful 10- day forecasts, which unravel hour by hour from warm and sunny to inclement weather to possible hailstorms and snow...

I love weather but frankly I'd rather read about it than live through it.  =)

Wednesday, June 6, 2018

13 to pick and choose from


Bob Dylan "Not Dark Yet"


Arlo Guthrie "If I Had a Hammer"


Mark Knopfler and Emmy Lou Harris "If This is Goodbye"


Lili, a short animation


Everly Brothers "Why Worry"


J.J.Cale, "Anyway the Wind Blows"


Traveling Wilburys


Paul Williams (Sad Song (with Muppets))


David Gray  "An Eclipse"


Toby Keith "Sundown"


Kingston Trio "Take Her Out Of Pity"


Joan Baez  "Farewell Angelina"


Iron and Wine "Time After Time"